Episode 26: How To Handle The 5% Of Parents That Are Trying To Destroy Your School

Episode 26 Show Notes


CLICK HERE for Hopes And Fears: Working With Today's Independent School Parents by Robert Evans and Michael Thompson

(This is an affiliate link. If you purchase through this link, at no additional cost to you, I receive a commission of 4% of the price of the book to help defray the costs of the podcast and the website. You don’t have to use this link if you prefer to purchase the book directly from Amazon or another vendor.)


Plug & Play PD

6 Ways to Build Effective Relationships With Difficult Parents

I have created a free “Plug & Play PD” for you. This is a 45 minute webinar complete with guided notes. You can use it at a staff meeting or to just coach up a teacher that needs to grow in the area of teacher communication.  Thanks! 

This Plug & Play PD is for you to use with your staff for free. I would love to hear from you if you use it with your team. Please email me at [email protected] and let me know if it was helpful. Thanks!

CLICK HERE for Guided Notes and Discussion Questions!

CLICK HERE  for the 45 minute webinar video

CLICK HERE for Episode 2: The Top 5 Ways To Build Relationships With Difficult Parents

CLICK HERE for Episode 18: How To Have A Successful Meeting With An Upset Parent


According to Robert Evans and Michael Thompson, some of the possible causes of the behavior of the 5 percenters:

  • Mental Health
  • Childhood Trauma
  • Extreme Narcissism
  • Extreme paranoia
  • Locked in a nasty custody battle
  • Truly entitled, upper class, rules don’t apply

Dr. Thompson and Dr. Evans describe The Three Types of 5 Percenters:

  • The Anxious and Incompetent
  • The Unresponsive
  • The Intimidators


According to Evans and Thompson, there are two overarching challenges with the 5 Percenters:

  • Boundary Breaking, persistent asking/telling to make significant exceptions to school policies
  • They can’t be reasoned with 


Each needs to be dealt with differently, but the common theme is that you as the leader need to get involved and you need to set limits with these parents.


Call to Action

  • I always like to give a call to action, but it is rare that the call to action involves spending money.
  • Your call to action is to buy the book, Hopes and Fears: Working with today’s independent school parents by Robert Evans and Michael Thompson
  • Part of Chapter 5, most of Chapter 10
  • The book is not cheap. Around  $100 on Amazon, can find it for around $50
  • Not saying that you should pay for this yourself, school’s budget for your growth or your teacher’s growth?
  • Chapter 9, the Basic Toolkit for working with 95% and Chapter 11, a guide for school leaders about how to train their teachers. Just those two chapters are worth the money.


I want to give you a gift to say “thank you” for listening to the podcast. I have created a FREE guide for you called “5 Strategies To Help You Work With Difficult Parents”. We know that working with parents is part of the job and most of our parents are great, but some of them can be very demanding and emotional and difficult. This guide will give you the tools that you need to build better relationships and have better meetings with the difficult parents at your school. CLICK HERE to grab the guide. Thank you again for listening every week!


If you implement any of these strategies at your school, I would love to hear from you! Send me a quick note at [email protected] and tell me about it. I can answer your questions and I’m also good at giving pep talks when you get stuck!


CLICK HERE for a bunch of free resources, including Plug & Play PD's (video webinars with guided notes) for you to use with your teachers, Top Lists of Leadership Books, Productivity Books, TED Talks and much more!


Please follow, rate and review this podcast. The rating helps this podcast to be heard by more leaders and your review gives me valuable feedback so that I can better serve you in future episodes. If you got value from this episode, please text the link to an aspiring leader at your school. Thanks!


Music by Twisterium from Pixabay